A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest. The man\’s tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half
empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his
newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, \”Say Father, what causes arthritis?\”

 

The priest replies, \”My Son, it\’s caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath.\”

 

The drunk muttered in response, \”Well, I\’ll be damned,\” Then returned to
his paper.

 

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and
apologized. \”I\’m very sorry. I didn\’t mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?\”

 

The drunk answered, \”I don\’t have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does.\”

Photo: Sgt. Joe Farley, former resident of Gloucester City, poses with local Sheiks during a Iraqi Police recruiting drive. Over 500 Iraqi local nationals were processed……Only a guy from Gloucester City could charm six sheiks to pose for a photo. Way to go Joe!

Hi Bill & Connie,

Well I want to write you hopefully my LAST email from Iraq before my Soldiers and I return home safely in Germany around the 22-23 of January 2008. Well its 0005 am on the 15th of January and its my last night I get to sleep in my room (container) before me and the last 7 Soldiers remaining from my Platoon here on FOB Iskan have to move into TENTS. We are probably flying out on Chinook Helicopters later sometime the night of the 18th and heading to BIAP.

So, to catch you up on what\’s been going on the past two weeks.

We conducted an Iraqi Police recruiting drive in which we had well over 500 Iraqi local nationals get processed thru at the Iraqi Army Compound located adjacent to FOB ISKAN over a 6 day period. This was the first time any of my soldiers and me had ever been thru such a MISSION. I\’m guessing that the 3ID leadership felt we had the most experience and we could handle anything they would throw at us even though we had only 2 weeks remaining here in IRAQ!

Photo: Police Recruits doing chin-ups..click to enlarge

As always we adapted and overcame any shortcomings and improved on each and every day putting more people thru the screening to become possibly Iraqi Police in the future.

Each potential candidate came with their packet and then got checked thru the HIIDE system in which we scan their pupils of their eyes and also scan their finger prints. We check if they have any prior arrests and negative incidents in which they had previously been scanned in the past. All this information then gets downloaded at the end of each day and gets put into the system which tracks thousands of Iraqi Local Nationals. Once this is done a group of ten goes thru and has 10 minutes to take their reading & writing comprehension exam.

Photo: Recruit must run a mile to qualify. This man is doing it in his bare feet on stones….click to enlarge

The paragraph that they have to answer 5 basic questions is probably at the best a 3^rd grade level. But as mentioned previously most Iraqi\’s don\’t get the opportunity to complete school and have to help at home.

After they do their test it gets graded by our Interpreters and they receive their score and then talk to an Iraqi Police officer. Once finished they have to conduct a PT test of 5 categories. They must perform 20 pushups, 20 Sit-ups, 5 Pull-ups, run 100 m, and 1500 m for time. These factors in with all that PASS their Reading & Writing Exam. Photo:

Some of the 500 recruits who applied for a job on the Iraqi police force (click to enlarge)

It\’s most important that each of the candidates can read and write because as an IP they have to be able to thoroughly understand their job duties and have the ability to complete the basic reports that they submit in their every day missions. Of the 500 Iraqi Local National only about 200 passed both the reading & writing portions and PT exam. These 200 then will go on to Babylon and Hillah where they will go thru another extensive exam and from there about 75% will get hired on to become Iraqi Police.

Each regular Iraqi Police makes between $300-400 max and this is enough to provide for their families. Its mind boggling how little they get but I guess its better then having them out there and tempted by Al Qaeda and other terror organizations that are present here in Iraq and taking their money to conduct attacks against Coalition Forces and Iraqi Police and Army personnel.

We are now currently conducting our 6th day of OJT for our NEW MP\’s (230th MPCO) out of out Kaiserslautern, Germany. We want them to have a good change over because it\’s always good to set up the incoming unit for success. We have already conducted our layouts of all our Hmmmv\’s and ASV\’s (Armored Security Vehicles), radios, Weapons, ammo, pyro, laser sights, night vision devices, computers, and the rest of the equipment so we can sign this all over to them.

Photo: Sgt. Noble Malone instructing recruit on proper way to do situp (click to enlarge)

As a Squad Leader I had over 3-4 Million dollars worth of property to maintain and hold accountability for. I think I had more stress these past 2-3 days making sure everything was accounted for and then transferred over properly to hand receipts to ensure the incoming Squad leader is set up for success and not left hanging. I was finally able to enjoy a nice evening at the gym and running 5 miles on the treadmill and doing some weight
training.

We have 2 days left to let them go out and conduct missions and patrol the areas that their going to be responsible after we leave here for the next 15 months by themselves. We have spent the past 3 days getting them familiarized with the primary & alternate routes for each of the Iraqi Police Stations and all their Check Points.

Photo: SSG Farley with K-9 Marco (click to enlarge)

We also made sure to introduce all the key MP leaders (NCO\’s and Officers) to the Iraqi Police Chiefs and Deputies of each Police Station. The other remaining days we have got them up to speed on trip tickets, mission briefs and debriefs, detainee reports,PSMR Reports (500 Question report documenting each Iraqi Police\’s status monthly), Story boards, IP Manning, and also to the FOB showing them all the stuff they need to do on a daily basis.

Well its 0100 am and I think I\’ve talked your ear off again. I might have to take you up on the offer on becoming a journalist…ha-ha…But I do enjoy writing especially informing others of the stuff that most of us don\’t get to see on the TV or read in the Newspapers.

There\’s a lot of PROGRESS going on here and all the people who are blind to the fact its IMPORTANT for their sons and daughters, husbands and wives to be here and doing what we are doing to help not only protect our Country, United States of America but to help improve the World and keep terrorists from building up and getting stronger and attacking again like they did on September 11, 2001.

Photo: SSG Farley can still do one-arm chin-ups! (click to enlarge)
I am hoping to come home now around the 20th of February after I take a little vacation and forget about the past 15 months and then see my family and friends. I will ensure that I come next store and say Hello. Please let me know before I leave here if you would like something from Iraq. It\’s not a problem. Also try to locate the address of the Gloucester City soldier that is now in Germany that you mentioned earlier that is also an MP. If you get me his name and address I be please to help in any way I can.

Thanks for always being a good listener. Looks like the Patriots and the Packers will be in the Super Bowl. My prediction is Patriots 31-24 over the Packers.

Sincerely,

SSG Joseph Farley
127th MPCO
CMR 470 Box 1686
APO AE 09185

Note from Bill: Sgt Joe Farley, is a former resident of Gloucester City and a graduate of Gloucester City High School. The Farley\’s are our neighbors. We watched Joe grow up from a little tyke into a man. He is great representative of the community of Gloucester City.

On behalf of the residents in Gloucester City I like to say, \”We are very proud of you Joe. Thank you and your fellow soldiers for the sacrifices you have made to protect our country.\”

Sincerely, Bill

Related: Christmas letter from SSG Farley Related: SSG Farley\’s October Letter

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

source http://sjoutdoors.blogspot.com

By Doug Skinner, South Jersey Outdoors

After my vacation, I thought a lot about why I enjoy the outdoors as much as I do. More specifically, why I can spend 8-12 hours on the lake fishing without getting hungry, cranky, or tired.

For the first time I have recognized passion in my hobby. It came while I was packing up to leave Florida, and only now have I had to time to reflect on the feeling I had while I was down there. Here\’s what happened:

As part of the packing-to-return-home ordeal I had to go down to the car and get my fishing rods so I could put them in the rod holder for the flight back. It was pouring, and time was of the essence, but that didn\’t stop the itch. The itch is that feeling that you have that is almost unbearable to ignore, and irritates you until you scratch it. My \”itch\” that day was for one more cast.

Now, \”one more,\” is never actually just one more. It\’s often as many casts as one can safely get off before missing anything too important (like a flight home 1000 miles away).

But I digress, it was raining steadily and a cold front approached so I knew two things were happening. First, approaching cold fronts often kick fish into high gear. They get excited, hungry, and aggressive as the front bears down. Second, temperatures were dropping fast, and at a certain point fishing would shut down altogether.

Quickly becoming drenched I went to the dock and with the grace and effort of a gazelle bounding away from an approaching lion, I casted as hard and fast as I could. The lure hit the water and with a few gentle twitches was immediately inhaled by a large Jack Crevelle. I was surprised by the attack and did not set the hook in time, which the fish took advantage of by immediately letting go of the hook.

The second cast proved more fruitful, this time I was prepared and set the as soon as I felt the fish bump my lure. It wasn\’t the biggest fish, in fact it was smaller than the first, but I landed him. Now, I was completely soaked and would have to change before we could leave. But it was worth it, it was enough to alleviate the itch I had to cast, at least temporarily…

My buddy \”Jack\”

In warmer weather, here in New Jersey, I often feel the same sort of itch. I can\’t go more than a day or two without planning my next excursion. I have always felt a passion for fishing, but have never explored the feelings. It wasn\’t until my trip to Florida that I grasped the intensity at which I need to stretch some line.

Hobbies are an important aspect of our lives. They give us something to enjoy without the added stress of supervisors and bosses. I consider myself lucky to have a hobby that keeps me outside often because I get to see amazing things both on the water and off.
reprinted with permission of Doug Skinner

MALESINSKI, IRENE ANNA
(nee Senkarik), on January 16, 2008, of Bellmawr. Age 90.
Beloved wife of the late Matthew. Devoted mother of William J. Martin (the late Patricia and Evelyn) and Irene Stone (the late William). Loving grandmother of Mark and Bryn Emkjer, Stephen and JurateMartin, Paula Gentlesk,William and Jeannine Stone and Edward and Christine Bates. Also survived by 11 great-grandchildren.
Relatives and friends are invited to attend the Memorial Mass 10am Saturday at Mary, Mother of the Church, 20 Braisington Ave., Bellmawr.
Family requests in lieu of flowers donations be made in Mrs. Malesinski\’s memory to Vitas Hospice, 18 E. Laurel Road, Stratford, NJ 08084. Expressions of sympathymay be e-mailed to Condolences@Gardner FuneralHome.com

BREYER, HARRY F.
Age 76, of (Holiday City), Williamstown, formerly of Deptford. Died suddenly Monday January 14, 2008, after a fall at home. At the time of his passing he was surrounded by his family.

Harry grew up in the Fairview section of Camden, he was a member of ICAC of Fairview. Harry worked for the New York Shipyard in Camden until it closed. He then went on to be a letter carrier in the Deptford-Woodbury Heights office serving the Sherwood section. He enjoyed spending time with family and friends, and especially enjoyed attending the grandchildren\’s activities. Harry loved to golf with his friends at Holiday City. He was known for his great sense of humor and his loving ways.

Husband of the late Lorraine. He is survived by his fiancee\’, Alyce Nelson, one daughter Lisa Masoorli and her husband Michael of Deptford, three sons William and his wifeDianne of Almonesson, Michael and his wife Jeanne of Woodbury Heights, Jeffrey and his wife Julie of Barrington, 8 grandchildren Kate, Michael, Allison, Jeffrey, Jamie, Jacob, Mark, and Alex, one brother William and his wife June of Newport Richey, FL.

Relatives and friends may visit with the family 7:00 to 9:00 pm Friday and 9:00 to 10:30 AM Saturday, at SMITHFUNERAL HOME 47 Main St., Mantua, NJ. Mass of Christian Burial will be held at Church Of The Incarnation, 240 Main St., Mantua at 11:00 AM. Interment will be in Eglington Cemetery, Clarksboro.
Contributions in his memory may be made to Alzheimer\’s Association, 3 Eves Dr, Marlton, NJ 08053.

A six year old goes to the hospital with his grandma to visit his grandpa.

When they get to the hospital, he runs ahead of his grandma and bursts into his grandpa\’s room.

\”Grandpa, Grandpa,\” he says excitedly, \”as soon as Grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!\”

\”What?\” said his grandpa?

\”Make a noise like a frog………

Because grandma said that as soon as you croak,………………we\’re going to Disneyland!!!\”

Six Gloucester Catholic High School seniors have been named Edward J. Bloustein New Jersey Distinguished Scholars. The state of New Jersey honored these students because they rank in the top ten percent of their class and achieved outstanding scores on the SATs taken during their junior year. Standing: Katie Cleminson, Micheal Barron, Caitlin McGinley, Alyse Scaffidi and Principal John Colman; Seated: Bridget Trefz and Ed Kispert.

Anthony Michael Cerrone, a United States Army World War II veteran and a recipient of the Bronze Star and Purple Heart for his outstanding service to our country passed away on January 17, 2008 at the age of 88.

A lifelong resident of Brooklawn Anthony was born in Camden City. He graduated from Gloucester City High School in 1938. He was a member of the Brooklawn American Legion Post # 72 for many years. Anthony worked for the New Jersey National Guard as an Ordinance Inspection Supervisor in Bordentown.

After his retirement, Anthony went to work for the family business, the Westbrook Bowling Lanes in Brooklawn for 40 years as a handyman. He and his family were one of the founding parishioners of Saint Maurice R.C. Church and a dedicated parishioner and member of the Holy Name Society. Anthony was a carpenter who enjoyed woodworking. He loved to go to the Racetrack especially with his family.

Loving son of the late James and Mary (nee Fiorillo). Devoted husband of 60 years to Josephine A. (nee Brassill). Beloved father of Pat Cerrone (Margaret) of Gloucester City, Mike Cerrone (Gayle) of Clarksboro, Maureen Collins (Bernie) of Brooklawn and the late James A. Cerrone. Dear Brother of Frank Cerrone (late Blanche) of Brooklawn, late Dolly Bearint (late Eb) and the late Joseph Cerrone (surviving wife Doris) of Brooklawn.

Beloved grandfather of Jerry and Phil Collins, Patrick, Kelly, Joseph and Theresa Cerrone and Michael (Emily) and Jill Cerrone. Loving uncle of Garry Cerrone and the late Frank Cerrone, Jr., Ebbie and Joyce Bearint, Daria and Jim Giles, Joanne and Mike Franco.

Relatives, friends and members of Post # 72 are kindly invited to attend his viewing on Monday evening from 6 to 9 pm and Tuesday morning from 8:30 to 9:45 am at the McCANN-HEALEY FUNERAL HOME: 851 Monmouth Street, (at Brown Street) Gloucester City.

Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated 10:30 am at Saint Maurice R.C. Church: 401 Community Road, Brooklawn. Interment with U.S. Army Military Honors in New Saint Mary\’s Cemetery, Bellmawr. Family requests memorial donations in Anthony\’s memory to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society: 216 Haddon Avenue, Suite 328, Westmont, NJ 08108 or the MS Foundation: P.O. Box 358, Gloucester City, NJ 08030. Please write in the memo of the check: Anthony M. Cerrone. Expressions of sympathy can be e-mailed to the family through our funeral home website www.mccannhealey.com.